My Heart is Broken
by winterwood11
Summary: 'He was an angel, a dark angel' 'Hermione you can't go on living this way' Hermione is depressed when she loses her love in the war. How will she cope with it?


**This is written for ResonatingLight666 's challenge 'Because I don't have an actual iPod' at the HPFC forum. The song I received was My heart is broken by Evanescence. This ended up different from what I thought.. but I hope you like it :)**

He was beautiful. His white-blond hair shone like moonlight in the darkness. That and his alabaster complexion made him look like an angel, a dark angel. And those grey eyes that would shine like silver whenever he was passionate about something. Of course, there was his snide tone and ever-present smirk, but he was sweet too, at least with me. Only I saw through his mask of indifference and coldness. Only I understood him for whom he truly was.

But what we had was gone.

His once bright eyes were blank and devoid of emotions, unlike his past mercurial orbs that swirled with complicated thoughts and feelings. I realised I would never hear his voice or feel his warm touch ever again. I could not bear to look away from him. Tears streamed freely down my face as I hugged him to my chest and refused to let go. I closed my eyes and lost myself in the memories of the past.

"_Granger," he broke the silence. _

"_What?" I answered in annoyance._

"_Do you like me?"_

"_You're insufferable, prejudiced and altogether a lowly ferret. I'm surprised that I can even stand you. Let alone like you."_

"_So you do like me!"_

"_Wh-what?" I stammered out. _

_He leaned forwards and gently pressed his lips against mine. I melted straight away, the doubts I had were gone. Yes, I did like him. Our first kiss in fifth year made that crystal clear. It had been such a joking mood when that happened. However, it was the times of darkness that followed that really made us a couple._

How would I survive without him? With him gone, everything seemed to have lost its shine. The world was like a monochrome world of grey. I knew from that moment when that killing curse hit him that I would never be the same. Of all ways to die, why die saving me? I was ridden with guilt.

His body was pried away from my weak grip. It felt as if some part of me was being torn away from my soul. Harry, Ron and Ginny tried to comfort me but I only nodded dumbly.

That evening I went to his funeral and burial like a zombie. Part of me had died with him. I could not even cry anymore, and that scared me. It was as if I was frozen, as if there was no more meaning in life.

"Sweet sleep, my dark angel," I whispered under my breath as his coffin was placed in the soil. I wanted to join him, but I knew that I had to live for my parents and my friends.

A day passed, a week passed, then a month. My friends were worried about me, I knew. Yet, I had no energy to live like the Hermione Granger that they knew.

"Hermione," A voice made me look up from the book I was reading. It was Harry. I turned away. "Hermione, please look at me. I know how you feel but you have to let him go."

"He's already gone." I said monotonously.

"Hermione, please listen. You can't go on living this way. You have to continue life. That's what Draco would want." Harry's voice now held a pleading quality.

In my heart, I knew that was true. He would have been furious at me if he had sacrificed his life for me to live like what I was doing now. I could not continue living this way. I wish I could turn back time to before I ever loved him. Then, my heart would not be broken like it was now.

Now, I became afraid; afraid that I would never be able to let go, afraid that I would be lifeless for the rest of my life. I was half alive without him.

Yet, I knew that the problem lay with me. I was too cowardly to let him go. How could I call myself a Gryffindor? He was dead, but I could not admit it to myself. All this time I had been retreating into my memories of him, of his laughter and joy. Then, I knew what I had to do.

"I know Harry. I know I can't." I told him, standing up from my chair and giving him a small smile.

I put my coat on and apparated myself to the cemetery where Draco was buried. It was winter and the land was barren with snow. I knelt before his grave and placed a rose on it.

"I miss you so much Draco. I haven't been able to cope with you gone, I keep thinking of the past, all those times where I had you. I've been denying it for too long. I think I can't take it anymore. I guess it's time to say," I whispered. "Goodbye."

"Goodbye!" I shouted at the top of my voice, tears now flowing down my face.

There. I admitted it. A slight breeze caressed me at that moment. I closed my eyes and sat next to the grave. My heart was still as painful as it was, perhaps even more. But, I knew I had to live on for my loved ones, and for Draco Malfoy.

**A/N: Thanks for reading :) Please review? **


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